Wow, just when I was starting to think that I was just a hopeless loser, I've discovered the root of the problem! Why, it's that blasted Mr. Coffee Nerves! That explains all of the irritability, sleepless nights, failure with women and irregular bowel movements. Now that I'm cured, I can only thank Postum! Yes, the 100% caffeine-free, coffee substitute. If you've got lots of problems and don't want to host 'em, get off yer keyster and start drinking Postum!
Note:
Postum was discontinued in October of 2007.
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